


Family Bonding - a Shrek, Nicki Minaj, and Nako story

by JadenJeong



Category: IZONE (Band), Nicki Minaj (Musician), Shrek (Movies)
Genre: Other, Parasites, a lovely fluff <3, shrek oppar is so cute uwu, talented cook nako, we stan an unproblematic family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-21
Updated: 2019-10-21
Packaged: 2020-12-27 21:27:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21125504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JadenJeong/pseuds/JadenJeong
Summary: a fluffy oneshot about our favorite family <3





	Family Bonding - a Shrek, Nicki Minaj, and Nako story

**Author's Note:**

> follow me on Twitter luvs <3 @Whorebih1

It was a quiet morning; birds were chirping outside in the swamp, and it was a truly splendid morning. Shrek wakes up, a yawn spilling from his gorgeous green lips, sitting up on his bed to stretch his muscular and sexy biceps. He looks to his side after smacking his lips, and his eyes land on his beautiful wife, Nicki.

There she was; the ethereal beauty was sleeping peacefully beside him, her body sprawled out on the other side of the bed. She was clad in the lovely robe Shrek had made for her on their 5th anniversary made of the finest foot fungus plucked straight off of the bottom of his feet. She looked absolutely stunning, Shrek thought. 

Her eyes flutter awake, her lips immediately forming a smile at the view of her hubby in front of her, his breath smelling of onions and booty.

“Goodmorning, baby boo,” the green God greets the love of his life, leaning down to press a soft kiss on her lips.

“Oh, Shrekkie,” she sighs blissfully, “ I wish that I could have this moment 4 life.”

Just then, they hear some slight commotion coming from the kitchen, along with the smell of fresh parasite soup, making their stomach growl in hunger. With that, they make their way over to the sounds and see their beloved daughter Nako stirring the delicacy in a large pot. They lean their heads on each other’s, their hearts swelling with pride.

“Good morning whores-, I mean, Mama and Papa!” Nako greets her parents, grabbing some bowls and serving everyone food. She places them on their dining table before her two beloved parents bring her in for a tight hug.

Shrek takes a sip of the dish, swirling it around in his mouth like mouthwash before washing it down his throat with a big loud GULP! His eyes widen, a pleased smile on his mouth.

“My goodness, sweaty, this is sublime!” 

Nicki does the same, getting a similar reaction after tasting the absolutely delicious and mouth-watering stew. 

“Holy moly, Nako dear, you truly have a gift from the Jahs! Hiisus has blessed you with Gordon Ramsey’s talent!”

This causes their dwarf daughter to blush, embarrassed from all the praise and compliments. Her mother, Nicki Minaj, gets up suddenly.

“This deserves a musical performance!” She fishes a microphone from in between her gigantic tiddies and begins.  
“Take your medication, Roman  
Take a short vacation, Roman  
You'll be okayYou need to know your station, Roman  
Some alterations on your clothes and your brain  
Take a little break, little breakFrom your silencing  
There is so much you can take, you can take  
I know how bad you need a Roman holiday (Roman holiday)  
A Roman holidayYou done, you tired?  
You suck at life?  
You don't want a round three? You done suffered twice  
Worship the queen and you might could pass  
Keep it real, these bitches couldn't wipe my ass  
Anyway, stylist, go get Bvlgari  
I am the ultimate Svengali  
These bitches can't even spell thatYou, you hoes buggin' - repel that  
Let me tell you this, sister  
I am, I am colder than a blister  
Cause my flow's so sick and I'm a lunaticAnd this can't be cured with no Elixir  
Cause y'all know who the fuck, what the fuck I do  
I done put the pressure to every thug I knew  
Quack quack to a duck and a chicken tooPut the hyena in a freakin' zoo  
Take your medication, Roman  
Take a short vacation, Roman  
You'll be okay  
You need to know your station, Roman  
Some alterations on your clothes and your brain  
Take a little break, little breakFrom your silencing  
There is so much you can take, you can take  
I know how bad you need a Roman holiday (Roman holiday)A Roman holiday  
Witch, twitch, bitch!  
Motherfucking right, this is World War 6  
This right here is gonna make a bitch dieAnd this right here is gonna make a bitch cry  
And if we being honest I am such a great guy  
And this what I do when a bitch breaks fly  
I'mma put her in a dungeon under, under No them bitches ain't eating, they dying of hunger  
Motherfucka I'm me, who the fuck is this ho?  
And yes, maybe just a touch of tourettesGet my wigs, Terrence, go and get my barrettes  
Take your medication, Roman  
Take a short vacation, Roman  
You'll be okay You need to know your station, Roman  
Some alterations on your clothes and your brain  
Take a little break, little break From your silencing  
There is so much you can take, you can take  
I know how bad you need a Roman holiday (Roman holiday)A Roman holiday  
Come all ye faithful  
Joyful and triumphant  
I am Roman ZolanskiCome all ye faithful  
Joyful and triumphant  
I am Roman ZolanskiCome all ye faithful  
Joyful and triumphant  
I am Roman Zolanski  
Talking bout me, you talking about me?  
I dare a motherfucker to be talking about me  
That bitch must be smokin' a couple of OZs  
They want the outline, I give them a goatee  
Talking bout me, you talking about me?  
I dare a motherfucker to be talking about me  
That bitch must be smokin' a couple of OZs  
A-buh-buh-buh now give then a goatee  
Take your medication, Roman  
Take a short vacation, Roman  
You'll be okay  
You need to know your station, Roman  
Some alterations on your clothes and your brain  
Take a little break, little break  
From your silencing  
There is so much you can take, you can take  
I know how bad you need a Roman holiday (Roman holiday)  
A Roman holiday.”

And they lived happily ever after.

The End.


End file.
